Every year on my kids birthday I write them a letter reflecting back on the years happenings and what I am feeling. My sweet little man turns 5 on July 11th.
Dear Hayden James,
Wow it is hard to believe that another year has passed and we are getting ready to celebrate your 5th birthday. You have had an incredible year. There have been NO emergency room visits and no trips to the doctor for illness. This means you have not had any stitches or staples, antibiotics or steroids. This is pretty big stuff for you and we are thrilled that you are finally getting healthier.
Every day you continue to amaze me with your strength and determination to recover from autism. I use to feel that it was up to me to recover you from autism but it is all you. You have to want to be present in our world and see the value in communicating with others. It is my job to give you every tool possible to recover from autism and let me tell you your tool box if full of tools.
In September of this past year Daddy and I made the decision to take you out of school to run a full time therapy program out of our home for you. The program that we are implementing is called Son-Rise. Son-Rise has been absolutely, hands down the biggest tool in your tool box. You spend on average 40 hours a week in your therapy room. In a couple weeks that time will increase to 65 hours a week. I landed us an externship with a local community college and will students coming to work with you.
You absolutely love being in your therapy room. The biggest change I have seen since starting Son-Rise is your happiness. You smile and laugh all the time now. Every word you say and every ounce of eye contact you give is celebrated. Sometimes I scare you with how much I celebrate. I have a hard time containing excitement at times. I am beyond proud of you. There are times that you honestly take my breath away with all the great, amazing, wonderful things you do.
Your language has also exploded this past year. You went from saying one word sentences to getting your needs met to talking spontaneously in full sentences. You ask and answer questions and make random comments. We have also seen a huge increase in eye contact.
Just tonight at dinner (which you sat at the table and ate with us) I was talking to you. You were giving me great eye contact and having several loops of conversation. Papa then joined the conversation. You continued to look at me. I said to you that Papa was talking to you and your turned and gave him eye contact and talked back and forth with Papa. This was one of those moments that took my breath away. I am one PROUD, PROUD, Mommy!!! You work so hard Hayden and I am as proud as can be.
We started a new yeast treatment protocol in December and have seen some great changes with that. This protocol started the removal of grains and sugar from your diet. The protocol consist of biotic silver and hard hitting probiotics. The biotic silver is an anti-fungal, anti-biotic, and anti-viral. It actually killed a huge wart you had growing on your wrist. This protocol has been very helpful to you. I have noticed a huge decrease in stimming, increased attention span, and a decrease in hyperactivity and agitation.
The next big change was in May when we switched diets to GAPS. You now eat refined sugar free, lactose free, and grain free. This was a HUGE adjustment for all of us. You and Ruby did not eat for 4 days. It was horrible seeing you and Ruby so sick looking but well worth it. You sleep better, you poop better, your attention span is better, and you eat 100 times better. We no longer consume processed foods. I make everything from scratch. One of your favorite foods is meatballs. I make them with ground beef, liver, and vegetables. For awhile you were consuming 3 lbs of meatballs a day!! You still love fruit and that continues to worry Mommy. Fruit has its fair amount of sugar so that tells me we still have some work to do with your gut. Your love for fruit is more like an addiction. You crave it and will do whatever it takes to get your hands on it.
You still love disney pixar cars and thomas the train. You love Ruby and enjoy spending time with her. One of your favorite things to do together is wrestle or run through the house playing tag with Mommy and Ruby. It amazes me that when ever Ruby is hurt you rush to her side and try to comfort her. You are such a sweet and loving big brother. Don't get me wrong you still bicker and argue like typical a brother and sister but you understand each other. Ruby gets that you have special needs and respects your space the majority of the time.
This year has been a big year for you showing affection and recognizing emotions. You love giving hugs and kisses and enjoy being cuddled. You often ask me to cuddle you. I must say I love to hold you tight and snuggle my little muffin man and you actually enjoy it too.
You learned to ride your bike with training wheels this year. You also started drawing pictures of people and things. You enjoy math and learned how to do simple addition and subtraction. You love to sing songs and enjoy slapstick humor.
There is so much in life that you love and enjoy these days. As the days go bye we see more and more of who you really are and less and less of autism. I have complete 100% faith in you and there is not one doubt in my mind that you will recover from autism. You want to be with us so badly. I see the spark in your eye and every day you work harder and harder.
I want you to know whatever happens over the years that Mommy and Daddy will always love you and accept you for who you are. You are such an amazing young man with a spark for life. There are so many people cheering you on and supporting you and our family. We are truly blessed to have you in our lives just the way you are.
I don't regret you having autism one bit. Autism has been a blessing in our lives and has showed me what truly matters. Autism also has forced me to dig deep inside myself to become a happier person.
I am excited to see what this year will bring us. I love you with all my heart.
XOXO,
Mommy
P.S
You totally and completely ROCK!!!
Beautiful Brandi! Happy Birthday Hayden, you rock!
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